Suicide awareness week starts today (9-10-12). Show your support by writing LOVE on your wrist or by wearing yellow. To kick the week off, here’s a song.
Sometimes I feel like I want to quit
No one will notice if
I forfeit my soul blow myself with a clip
That’s my father did no gun, a noose and he hung
My mom found him in the basement there as he swung
At 5 years old what does that do to a kid
Produced a maniac anthrax type of a kid
I hear an ambulance, sirens I’m told to be silent
I’m blind trying to find why my house is a riot
Got to go can’t take it, Uncle Dave’s face is changing
I race to find my father in the bottom of the basement
My mothers covered in tears her face filling with fear
Bang’s on the floor shout’s to God why am I here
Scared to even ask, where my dad is at the time
I guess for now it’s just a memory
The above are the opening lyrics to the Manafest song, “My Life”
Chris Greenwood (aka Manafest) lost his father to suicide at a young age and even though he’s now in his 30’s, has a successful marriage and music career, this tragic event from his childhood is still making an impact. The painful memories and images are sprinkled throughout his discography of albums and it breaks my heart every time I hear him sing about the loss he is still dealing with.
Death is something we all have in common. It’s a connecting factor that binds all living things together. One day each of us will pass away and leave this place, but when one jumps ahead and does so by their own hand, the emotional scars that are left behind on those who are still here can be immeasurable.
There are six instances of suicide recorded in the Bible. Five from the Old Testament and one in the New Testament. The one recorded in the New Testament was of Judas Iscariot, who hanged himself after betraying Jesus (Matthew 27:5). As for the Old Testament: Two of the suicides were those of Abimelech and Saul, both occurred after each was seriously wounded in battle (Judges 9:50-55; 1 Samuel 31:1-6). Then Ahithophel committed suicide when Absalom did not receive his counsel (2 Samuel 17:23). Zimri, king of Israel, chose to burn his palace down and kill himself rather than be captured by his enemies (1 Kings 16:18). And then of course there was Samson, who took his own life while also taking revenge on the Philistines (Judges 16:28-30).
It might seem strange, but I like that these suicides are recorded for us in the Bible. It shows that this is an old problem, one that the human race has been dealing with ever since antiquity and not just in the here and now. And right along with the depression and hopelessness that can eventually lead to suicide or attempted suicide by the ones who are suffering, there are those who also bear the marks of being left behind. Guilt, loss, grief and so many more emotions can slash through the survivors who have lost friends, family members and loved ones. Death leaves a mark that stays and although people move on and continue with their lives, the memories are forever etched into our hearts.
If you are dealing with thoughts of suicide or know someone who is then please reach out for help. Start talking. Don’t stay silent but let someone know how you feel and what’s going on. You are not alone, there are so many people who are dealing with or have dealt with suicide/loss in uncountable ways.
suicide hotline: 1-800-273-8255